Log in

No account? Create an account

Send My Conscience Home in a Taxi

Externalised Memory

Previous Entry Share Next Entry
Of Reproduction and Related Matters
Tram In Snow
Over the weekend (Sunday in fact, in one of the local cafes which I prefer because of the way they make their chai) I got talking to a couple, whom I shall call A and H.

I met them through paula_angela, although it turns out H at least knows a lot of people I know through the ALP.

A and H want to have kids, they have only one problem... They have two wombs and none of that other stuff required to make a baby! Hence they put out the call for... Men!

So we had a terribly interesting chat. I've talked about this stuff before, although not seriously, with at least two sets of lesbian friends. It's faaaaaar more complicated than it might first appear. So many things need to be sorted out, such as:

How much contact/involvement does the third party have? Is it just a donation and nothing further? Or does one work out an arrangement up to and including co-parenting? How does this stuff end up impacting on my relationships and (later) decisions to reproduce? If I end up through various circumstances being responsible for the child(ren) in question, that would make having kids of my own complicated. This is before one gets into the legal implications - in this heterosexually biased world, the biological father is technically responsible for the child they produce, no matter the exact circumstances of its conception, or even if it already has two mommies.

A and H have been together for a long time, which is encouraging. And they've really thought about this stuff. What they want to do is form a relationship of sorts with someone (possibly me!) over a period of months or so, before anything happens. It's a bit like going on a series of dates at some level, they have to like me before they'd think about wanting to... Er, I wonder what the polite term is here? Before they decide to chose me...

Will have to introduce them to Deb as well, make sure we all get along.
Tags: ,

  • 1
i have a similar situation thats been pitched my way

my best friend of 10 years has dibs on my ovaries as his way to breed. and we (if we ever do it) would co parent & live in the same house regardless of relationships

have fun with the lesbians and erm good luck hahahahah

I had a similar deal going with an old school friend when I was in my twenties. If neither of us were married by the time we were thirty, we'd marry each other. Trouble is, then I dated her when we were both 28 and it went miserably, and we've barely spoken since!

Sounds like a half way decent plan you've got there... Maybe we should start a commune and have like a mob of unruly unwashed children running about...

  • 1