Send My Conscience Home in a Taxi

Externalised Memory

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Weirdest of Weird Dreams
Agent Smith
I went a bit space cadet this morning. I was eating my breakfast.... Then I was staring at my toes for some time... Then Marvin, my cat, was sniffing them, so I stared at him.

I had the weirdest dream! I was in the back garden whipper snippering, and I snipped so hard around the base of the clothes line that I started digging up mud. Then for some reason our bed was in the “sun room”, and my girlfriend was digging out mud from the head of it. I told her if you wanted to garden you should go outside. Then I was out the front of the house with several members of my family, although it was a somewhat different house with a big white front door. For some reason, people kept on thinking it was a restaurant. And about every second pair of people turned out to be burglars, who for some reason kept on wandering up to the front door even though we were watching them. But there were some more folks inside, expecting them, so they caught them and held them for... some reason!

Then I was around the side of the house, and a whole mob of my friends had turned up to a party for me. They were trying to surprise me by turning up all at once with various Star Wars helmets on. But I was there and spotted them before they made it into the house. But I appreciated the effort, and was pleased to see that a woman called Tammy had shown up. Then I was wandering in the back of the house, wondering why someone had parked a NASCAR car there... It turned out to belong to Mario Andretti, who was also there...

Finally I heard a loud banging sound coming from upstairs (turns out this large house had at least two stories). I went up to find out what it was. A teenager with very bushy hair was in his bed, banging his head against the headboard. His parents where there watching him, didn’t seem particularly concerned. I asked what the problem was, and he handed me his maths homework, which looked like Sudoku crossed with a cross word. For some reason I could make sense of it and started helping him with it...

Then I woke up... My brain is odd.
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